Claire is furious about neighbors Ronnie and Amber's eye-sore of a boat on their front lawn and it soon becomes an all-out war when Phil calls in the "big guns" as back up - his dad Frank and all his retired friends to give them a taste of their own medicine. Elsewhere, Jay is trying to potty train Joe but Gloria does not think he's ready yet, and Cam secretly takes Lily to clown school behind Mitchell's back.

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Guest Stars: Steve Zahn as Ronnie, Andrea Anders as Amber, Broopke Sorenson as Tammy, Fred Willard as Frank Dunphy, Alex Wyse as Sales Associate, Jack Axelrod as Harvey, Edmund L. Shaff as Victor, Elimu Nelson as Officer

Writers: Vali Chandrasekaran

Director: Jeffrey Walker